Smoothies: The Dentures of the Future!

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Back in high school Mom started making us fruit smoothies with Myoplex protein powder with the hopes that it would help us grow into tall, strong and healthy and boys.

My first girlfriend introduced me to veggie smoothies.  Spinach, parsley and kale in my liquid fruit salad???!  What the heck is kale? :O

Smoothies became the perfect breakfast and the perfect post-workout meal after Aunt gave me her Vitamix.  I upgraded (downgraded to some people) from fresh veggies to organic, powdered wheat grass, spirulina, chlorella and the like.  Bee pollen, nut milks, kefir, maca powder, cacao powder, turmeric powder, a fresh chili pepper.  Edible and healthy? Bam! Into the blender it went.

One day I was at the checkout line with Mom at Whole Foods and we had a load of ingredients on the conveyor belt for some awesome smoothies.  An idea popped in my head.

Use it or lose it.

You often hear this phrase if you study languages.  Spanish was my second. Mandarin, third.  I’ve lost most of my Spanish because opportunities to use it in my daily life dried up.  Thankfully I’m in Taiwan, so I can salvage any remnants of Mandarin as those Mandarin neurons clamber to the surface of my prefrontal cortex shouting, “save me!  I’ll be important in the future when China starts making a splash in the water!”

People used to have a lot more body hair than they do now.  Many men still have a ton more than I do.  Guys on the soccer team  back in college used to ask me if I shave – never until I did for a triathlon).

In our evolutionary process, we’ve lost our body hair because, well, who knows the real reason why.1)

But I fancy the idea of cold climates, so I’ll expand my idea based on this assumption.  We have lost the need for insulation.  In warmer climates body hair is more a burden than a comfort.  The next time you see a hairy guy walking down Santa Monica pier, just remember you’d be jealous of him in Norway.

I asked Mom, “Do you think if people keep drinking smoothies, we’ll evolve and lose our teeth?  I mean we used to be hairy.  Then we didn’t need it anymore.  If we keep drinking smoothies, if every meal becomes a smoothie, what need do we have for our teeth?”

She looked at me stunned and jokingly responded, “You’re crazy!”  The young cashier laughed as she continued to type in PLUs into the POS system.

To me, it makes absolute sense.  It might take a long time for it to happen. Humans may cease to exist before the point in time that knocks the teeth out of our mouths.  And with Soylent and other meal replacement shakes, more and more people are looking to concoct the next ‘big’ convenient goop.

One of the arguments for a potential cause for osteoporosis is the lack of stress on the bones, not the lack of calcium.2)  Think about it…  With no stress on the bones, Calcium asks himself, “why do I need to be here?  Peace.”

People are not creating enough impact on their bones to warrant their bodies to want to keep their bones.  In other words, running would be a great method to prevent osteoporosis.

Slurping down a smoothie has benefits.  It’s convenient because the blender blades do the chewing for you, allowing a thick, cool liquid to trickle down your esophagus.  Unfortunately smoothies are not traditional Chinese medicine friendly.3)  Also, the act of chewing has benefits for your brain.4)

Your teeth are actually harder than your bones.  If they become unemployed, Trump might have a huge problem on his hands and he is not an orthodontist…

But… there’s a certain charm to a toothless smile =D


Has anyone done the research on what the combination of 37 healthy ingredients of a smoothie in a single serving can do to you?  Avocados are great for you.  So are blueberries.  My reflection study shows there need to be studies that show a) the benefits of avocado by itself b) the harmful effects of avocado by itself c) the benefits of blueberries by themselves, d) the harmful effects of bb by themselves and e) the benefits of a + bb  f) harmful effects of a+bb.

Or is that too much studying? Too much funding?  And do we just eat and hope that we don’t mistakenly combine two ingredients that shouldn’t have been combined?

And should foods be eaten in their natural climate?  Maca is a Peruvian root vegetable touted for its adaptogenic properties that has skydived from high up in the Andes down to the sea-level, paradises of Santa Monica and Venice, California.  Aside from the rat-race culture, there isn’t much stress to endure in those laid-back environments.  Coffee grows in subtropical climates.  Seattle is classified as oceanic or temperate marine.

No wonder society is so complex?  Species have been introduced into completely foreign places.

What’s your definition of eating local?


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The Three-Foot World of the Emoting Machine. Think with the heart. Live hard, train harder, die easy. =」

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